From R&B to country, students say music has become a major influence on how this generation experiences love, and not always in the healthiest ways.
“Music has become an outlet for how we process love and pain,” said sophomore Sarah Shields. “When artists glorify toxic behavior, social media magnifies it, turning unhealthy relationship dynamics into trends.”
Across genres, love is often portrayed as chaotic or controlling. In hip-hop, artists like Future and Summer Walker make emotional detachment sound desirable. Future’s lyric, “She belongs to the streets,” has become a viral slogan celebrating avoidance over vulnerability. Pop stars like Olivia Rodrigo and The Weeknd mix heartbreak with obsession. Rodrigo sings, “Maybe I’m too emotional/But your apathy’s like a wound in salt,” while The Weeknd confesses, “Bring your love, baby, I could bring my shame.” These lyrics frame love as pain, teaching listeners that dysfunction equals passion.
Country music also leans into toxicity. Morgan Wallen’s hit, “Last Night,” captures a cycle of fighting and regret: “We said we’d had enough/But I can’t remember what I was trying to forget.” Similarly, Kelsea Ballerini’s, “Miss Me More,” reflects on losing herself in love. While catchy, these themes can shape how audiences interpret commitment and conflict.
“I think that music reflects modern relationships because it blurs the idea of real love,” said junior Kayla Mitchell. “We listen to music that constantly talks about how love has to be toxic, and you have to argue for it to be real, but that’s not true at all.”
Experts have found parallels in how musical messaging affects listener attitudes. A 2023 study examining sexual music lyrics and sexting uncovered associations between explicit lyrical content and risk behaviors. Research from Johnson-Baker links rap music exposure in early adolescence to earlier sexual initiation, mediated by perceived peer behavior. Another review of media and music argues that sexual content in lyrics and videos helps normalize risky behaviors among youth.
Dr. Brian Primack, a media-and-health researcher, argues that repeated exposure to media content shapes attitudes and norms, a point he has made in interviews and in his book, “You Are What You Click.” Scholars who work with Primack’s research find that repeated exposure to degrading or violent lyrics is associated with changes in adolescents’ attitudes and behaviors.
Students note that not all artists perpetuate negative patterns. Many are using their platforms to redefine love in healthier ways. In R&B, SZA’s, “Good Days,” focuses on healing and self-worth: “Half of us chasing fountains of youth and it’s in the present now.” Pop artist Ariana Grande’s, “We Can’t Be Friends,” centers emotional closure instead of revenge, while Victoria Monét’s, “On My Mama,” celebrates confidence and joy.
“As listeners, we have to decide what kind of love we want to absorb,” Shields said. “Music can either teach us to repeat the same cycles or break them.”
Whether it’s heartbreak ballads or self-love anthems, one thing is clear: the soundtrack to modern love has real influence on how people see relationships and themselves.
