The Charger Bulletin

Please buy my clothes, I’m going on a reality show

Justin Coviello, Campus News Editor April 4, 2023

SATIRE Much like any adolescent child with the entirety of human creativity at his fingertips, I grew up with a dream: to be a reality television star. Throughout my formative years, I spent hours a...

Charger x YikYak collab.

The university should turn to Yik Yak as its official correspondence platform

Justin Coviello, Campus News Editor April 4, 2023

SATIRE A common opinion among university students is that they are tired of getting bombarded with emails every day: Canvas grade change this, “your package is ready” that, and what the heck is...

Blood Hunt: Those who own the night

Antoinette Yen, Entertainment Editor April 12, 2022

Satire Dear Entertainment Editor, Why is life so cruel? What exactly is our crime, that we must live off of the blood that flows through our veins? What do you think we'll do if we're thirsty for a drink?...

Fanned-out one-dollar bills, West Haven.

Out with the old, in with the new

Teresa Zangari, Contributing Writer April 5, 2022

Satire I have never been more thankful for the continual rise in academic tuition prices. It is bold of us to allow ourselves to be embraced with a lifetime of debt for the useless education we are...

The Resident Italian and Sports Editor display their love-hate relationship, West Haven.

Meet the brains behind the Bulletin

Lindsay Giovannone, Sports Editor April 5, 2022

Satire Kayla Mutchler “The Big Cheese” Kayla has been a dedicated writer to the Charger Bulletin since her freshman year. Assuming the role of The Big Cheese for the past two years, she has been...

Charlie the Charger: Admission’s token nonbinary icon

Charlie the Charger: Admission’s token nonbinary icon

Mia Adduci, Student Life Editor April 5, 2022

Satire We all know that the queer population at the University of New Haven is vast, yet somehow, despite our overpowering ratio, we tend to be underrepresented. In recent light, the university has displayed...

The illustrious Forest swimming pool, West Haven.

Multi-layered pyramid scheme reveals university recruitment strategy

Mia Adduci, Student Life Editor April 5, 2022

Satire Recent discoveries have unveiled the truth behind the recruitment process at the University of New Haven. A pyramid scheme, code-named “Charlie’s Angels” after CEO Kaplan’s personal favorite...

Isabelle Hajek and Linsday Giovannone touch grass for the first time in their lives during HNRS 1111, West Haven.

Honors program announces totally real course listings for fall semester

Editorial Staff, Editorial Staff April 5, 2022

Satire It is officially the point in time during the second semester where the registration process for next fall has begun, and the highly anticipated list of Honors courses has been released. Here are...

UNH After Dark: The real student news source

UNH After Dark: The real student news source

Julianna Pegnataro, Contributing Writer April 5, 2022

Satire The Charger Bulletin staff has been consistently scoping out the University of New Haven news competitors over the years. Now, they are starting to wave their white flags in the air and surrender...

Residential housing to exponentially improve by 2042

Logan Dumas, Contributing Writer April 5, 2022

Satire There have been rumors spreading around campus recently that some of the university's current residence halls are projected to be remodeled for the future. There has been talk through the grapevine...

The problem with affordable healthcare: it exists

Amanda M. Castro, Managing Editor March 30, 2021

Disclaimer: This article is considered a piece of satire meaning that it is not to be taken literally or seriously. Free healthcare is necessary. At the ripe age of 12, I was diagnosed with type one...

Never listen to upperclassmen

Kaitlin Mahar September 3, 2014

While freshmen may primarily benefit from these five key pieces of advice, anybody is welcome to use them as their own personal guidelines for navigating the treacherous jungle that is college, particularly...

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