10 Things That Piss Me Off About the Grammys

Zack Rosen

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There are ten things I’d like to discuss that piss me off about the Grammys. No, I’m not going to touch upon certain styles of music. But there are quite enough other things to talk about that should get my point across.

1. The fact that Justin Beiber is, like, 10 years old. And Ke$ha Is, like, a whore.
As far as Justin Bieber goes, somebody needs to tell him he isn’t that amazing. Also, he’s only ten. Oh, and Bon Jovi and Beyoncé look nothing alike, kid.

2. Ke$ha’s voice.
“Toes, toes.”
“Phones, phones.”
“Sha-oes, shoes.”
Enough said.

3. People who don’t understand why Lady Gaga didn’t win everything.
Don’t get me wrong…nothing is more enjoyably addictive than Bad Romance. I don’t really mind Lady Gaga. But she’s new. She’s not going to win Record of the Year, nor did she deserve it. Kthanxbye.

4. People who haven’t heard of Smokey Robinson or John Legend.
I legit heard from someone who, when the Michael Jackson tribute began, didn’t know who Smokey Robinson or John Legend were. Smokey Robinson is one of the most influential R&B singers ever, and John Legend’s last name is freakin’ “legend!” Grow up and stop listening to Eminem, and maybe you’ll know who these guys are.

5. People who don’t listen to R&B because it’s what everybody listens to.
I admit that rap, hip-hop, and R&B aren’t my preference in musical genre. But that doesn’t mean that I won’t listen to them. Even if I don’t like a song, I make a point to listen to it so that I can learn more about music.

You may hate R&B or hip-hop, fine. But don’t refuse to listen simply because the music is “too popular” or because you like classic rock. Open your eyes!

6. Taylor Swift.
I’m not really a big fan, but the girl [apparently] writes her own music. And sings pretty well.
That said…
Last night she was awful. Absolutely awfully out of tune. When she sang a duet with Fleetwood Mac’s Stevie Nicks, Taylor Swift was so bad that I could barely hear the bahh-ing of Stevie’s lamb-voice.

7. The fact that Elton John got lost.
Seriously, wtf was that! Lady Gaga and Elton John!? I mean, sure, it was kinda entertaining. But to be quite honest, I think Elton John just got lost. He probably took the wrong turn at Albequerque, fell on the ground (that explains his dirty face Sunday night) and then started playing piano.

8. MJ’s kids.
I’m sure somebody will put a hit out on me for saying this, but let me preface it by I love Michael Jackson’s music. Honestly love it.
But I don’t like how his family and agents are exploiting his poor kids. Stop putting them on stages and telling them to talk about how great their father was. Whether the tears are real or fake, I don’t need a kid telling me how amazing their dead father was just so that you’ll sell more copies of a DVD.

9. Making Green Day a musical.
Um, what?

10. Autotune, autotune, autotune.
It has it’s uses. It sounds neat. It’s fun. It also proves how many modern musicians have no musical talent. You’ve got “pain” in your name for a reason, T.
All I can hope for is that, maybe, next year will provide for less reasons to complain.

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10 Things That Piss Me Off About the Grammys