Positives 

+ Happy Arson Awareness Week from the Fire Science Club! Or, if you’re a freshman trying to microwave a poptart, just another week.

+ A moment of silence for all of the students who are about to destroy their livers during Spring Weekend. Be sure to post all photos of partying with Dave Coulier and Mr. Woodchuck. Cut. It. Out.

Negatives

– Students were excited about the Glowstick Party the Music Industry Club put on in the quad on Saturday. They were even more excited when it was over.

– After attending The Department of Economics’ Economically High on Marijuana event on Monday, stoners all over campus are demanding an apology for giving the event such a misleading name.

Battery Charge

It’s our penultimate week of classes, and I think we’re all looking forward to celebrating at Spring Weekend after such a long, crazy year. We’re not completely done yet though, so don’t check out too early – showing up drunk to class these last two weeks (if at all), is not recommended.