Dear Melanie,
I think my boyfriend is cheating on me. I’m not sure if he has done anything physical yet, but I know that he is texting and “snapchatting” this girl a ton and I am nervous that if it hasn’t already it might turn into something. Any advice?
With technology today it is almost impossible to keep a private life, private. Social media makes everyone a part of everyone else’s business, and sometimes that is unavoidable. There are some people I know who spend there days talking to people over Twitter or Facebook messenger that they have never met in person before, that’s why shows like Catfish on MTV can boom with business in today’s industry.
The reason I am bringing this new age into perspective for you is because sometimes things that seem obsessive are innocent with the way society works today. I have girl friends that send out Snapchat after Snapchat to the same people in their contacts, and if my boyfriend was sitting next to me opening all of them up, I would definitely be annoyed. If he isn’t constantly answering them, it could just be a case of a girl addicted to taking selfies.
That being said, texting isn’t a part of social media and can unfortunately be a different thing because that means he is actually having conversations with her. It is hard to tell what those conversations are about and if they’re innocent or not because you aren’t your boyfriend or the other girl. For all you know the girl could be constantly asking him about homework assignments because she doesn’t pay attention in class.
The best piece of advice I can give you is to sit down and talk to your boyfriend. I say talk very strongly because accusing him of cheating on you right off of the bat could make him go and do that very thing if he hasn’t already. Guys tend to run in the opposite direction when they are wrongfully accused of something. Talking could solve everything and you may just find out that it’s his younger cousin from Vermont. However, if you get an answer that really hurts you, at least you caught it before you had to hear it from someone else.
This is definitely a tough situation to give advice on because of today’s world. People that have never met face-to-face are going on “virtual” dates and falling love over apps. Then again people have easy access to classmates and friends for questions or companionship as well, and that could really be all it is.
Talk to your boyfriend, state why it concerns you, and make him realize what he would feel like if the roles were reversed. I’m sure everything will work out and no matter the outcome there is someone out there for everyone.
