Everyone has been there – you’re the only single person in the room. You see couples walking around on campus holding hands and sharing a kiss. You’re bound to see a romantic dinner at one of the dining halls while sitting by yourself staring down at your slice of pizza to avoid being seen. This is all made worse when your classmates talk about their dates from the weekend and announce their engagements on social media. It’s hard not to feel envious about not having a significant other, especially when Valentine’s Day is right around the corner.

This feeling can prompt people to seek out relationships: dating apps, mixers in the dorms, heading downtown to find a companion. Sometimes our loneliness causes us to throw ourselves into something without thinking. These encounters can turn messy and can hurt both partners if neither can truly commit. These habits of obsessing over romantic love and seeking out a relationship every day are not recommended, and it compromises your true desires and feelings.

But I feel there is someone you can love, even if you don’t think about it. This person has been with you for all your life and cares about nothing more but the best for you. That person? It’s you.

Before you start to share your feelings and love for others, the first thing you must do is love yourself. To truly feel fulfilled in a relationship, you must know how you truly feel and what you really love. You must love your perks and your flaws and prioritize your happiness and love above all else. The love you have for you will help you to prioritize your needs and wants and will help you feel more confident. Confidence is the most attractive quality in anyone and is the best way to find a true love who is equally confident.

The best love you can give is to yourself. When you look around the corner and see people sharing a hug and a kiss, it’s okay to feel a little blue, but don’t worry about it too much. Remind yourself that your number one love is you; you love who you are and what you’ve become. Don’t pursue a relationship out of jealousy, but let love take its course and find you.

Sometimes that special someone isn’t going to be right around the corner, even after starting to give yourself unconditional love. The key is patience. Listen to your friends when they say don’t dive headfirst looking for love, it will happen. It takes time to find someone to share your love with, be it weeks, months or even years. But don’t give up if it doesn’t happen soon enough either. Sometimes the right lover for you is out there in your shoes trying to love themselves and accept who they are. Love is a very fickle concept, and it will find you when the time is right.

If you worry about not having a love interest sometimes and feel lonely, remember you are not alone –  you have friends and family who love you. Familial love is one of the greatest loves in the world, and there are several friendships that have great amounts of love that shared between two people. Take the time to remember and value the relationships that you have already. Those connections were made out of a unique kind of love that is just as strong as the love between two romantic partners. Cherish the love you have now and never forget its value.

Sometimes love doesn’t come easy, and it can be hard to accept that it doesn’t come in a minute. But remember, you have someone you can love. You can love yourself and grow from that personal love. You can share your love with your friends and family, the people who love you regardless. Remember to not rush into or give up on love, when you learn to love yourself and your life, love will soon find you.