Ask Melanie



Dear Melanie,

I was dating a girl for a little while and we were going to see where things led and possibly be in a relationship. She’s an amazing girl—smart, witty, creative and beautiful on top of everything else. I started to feel myself getting depressed; it happens pretty frequently, so I told her that I could not do it anymore. I figured maybe in the future, it would work but right now I have a lot of baggage holding me down. This was a few months ago and she told me that she had to stop being friends with me because she was falling for me in the time that we were dating and it hurt her to only be friends with me. I’ve respected her wishes and haven’t talked to her at all but I miss her so much and I don’t know if I should tell her or not.


Dear Reader,

I think that you should not open that can of worms until you’re ready to be with her. If you just want to tell her you miss her to see if she misses you and then get back to your life, then you definitely should continue not talking to her. If you are ready to try again, then by all means, talk to her and tell her how you feel.

By telling her you miss her, you will make her believe that you guys might have a chance right now and, unless that’s true, you shouldn’t start anything.

Also, she may be dating someone new and you don’t want to interfere if you aren’t going to be serious or ready to give her what she wants.

Missing people is a part of life; if you can’t actually do anything about it other than tell her you miss her, then try to hold on to the memories and let her go.